Once you've mastered listening, the "rescuer" in you will still want to contribute. Here's the most effective process to do that. It takes three steps:

1. Clarify
2. Affirm
3. Question

To Clarify: state what has been said and the emotion someone is feeling. Just the facts. Don't agree or disagree.

To Affirm: take into account what you know about the person's values, talents, and previous behavior and help them see why it's normal (and okay) for them to be feeling this way.

To Question: this is where real movement and rewiring can occur. When you ask an open-ended, neutral, and powerful question, solutions begin to effortlessly present themselves, and energy shifts to allow for possibility. (Check out the next lesson on how to ask the best questions!)

To become masterful at this takes practice, practice and more practice.

Throughout this module you have identified your communication default habits. Creating new habits will take practice: listening and applying this communication model and watch what happens in the relationships, conversations, and actions of those around you.

Assignment: Listen to the short audio explanation as you look at the Communication Process Model below.

Connect: Share with the learning community the value you see in this process for you personally. What conversation will (or have you) already practiced with? What was the outcome?